Being Plump

I've been over-weight since 19 years old, and since then I've been 'bruised' by others' criticism and worse, even I criticised myself. I hate looking at mirrors, and even in my worst condition, I would punch my flabby tummy to release the disappointment and grief.

But it was then. Now, despite of the occasional criticism that I get once in a while, I'm more positive about it. I'm over-weight, that's the fact but Alhamdulillah, I'm healthy; normal blood pressure, normal level of cholesterol, normal sugar level and above all I'm happy with my life.

I'm still plump, even more plump than before. I'm 31 weeks pregnant and so far Alhamdulillah, a healthy mother-to-be....

Disclaimer: The following photos might be 'hazardous' to some viewers, especially if you have a perfect slim body or you personally disgust fat people. :)

Me @ Nandos Cowley Road for Abang's 27th birthday
24 weeks pregnant

Me @ home - 30 weeks pregnant

Our Weekend 22 - 23 Nov 2008

They visited us in Oxford somewhere in August this year. So, we decided to return the visit last weekend. It took us around 2 hours to get to their place and my first impression was "this is a lovely neighbourhood!"; a good place to stay indeed.

We were greeted with warm welcome from the hosts and hot-delicious 'mee kari' (thanks Fara!). Later, Kak Gee and family joined us for lunch. Then, Fara and Mosan took us to Loughborough University. It is a campus-like university, very much similar to UTM Skudai back home, plus with excellent sporting facilities. Took some photos of us in the Civil & Building Engineering building and at the front gate. It was extremely cold, so we cut our visit short and headed back to their place.


Later in the evening, Dino & Maz (friends of Fara & Mosan) came to the house. Very friendly and bubbly couple. It's good to be acquianted with nice and modest people. After a long day, we retired at 10pm for our early day tomorrow.

Sunday morning. Had our English breakfast and we were off to the car boot sale. The weather was not promising though, and as expected, the boot sale was a bit disappointing. However, we managed to get ourselves a toy for the upcoming baby, a cookbook and 2 motorcycles models. Then we decided to continue our shopping spree at IKEA Nottingham, and it was very fruitful. We bought a bookshelf, baby's cot (with mattress, mattress protector and cover), a jar and frying pan. Well, it was a bargain, and we seemed to forget that we drove (only) a saloon car. So, as expected, Fara and Mosan had to sit (uncomfortably) on the bookshelf and baby's cot for almost 40minutes (Sorry guys! We were over excited!).

We went to Kak Gee's house for a short visit. Had a lovely 'bihun goreng' (even had seconds! hehehe) and long chat. Then, we headed back to Fara & Mosan's place and packed our things for home. Fara prepared lunch (it was delicious!! and of course I had seconds! heheh) and after Maghrib prayer, we made our move to Oxford.

It was such a lovely weekend; spending time with good friends as well as meeting new people. We will come again (Insya-Allah) to Loughborough, and we hope our friends there will come visit us here in Oxford.

To Fara & Mosan, thank you very much for the warmest hospitality. Semoge dimurahkan rezeki.

P/S : Fara, aku x serik ok.. Next time kite gi serang Stoke-on-Trent plak.

My Definition of Romantic

I've been thinking about this entry for quite some time actually, but I can't really decide on the actual title and the language (if you realise, I tend to use Bahasa and English for my entries, depending on the mood).

Generally speaking, most women would want to be loved, pampered and cared by men, romantic men; how may that woman defines romantic to her taste. I myself have been constantly changing my own definition of romantic since I could understand what being romantic is.

From puberty (at 11 years old) till 16 years old
Romantic = give flowers and gifts , surprises (good ones, of course), gestures (hold your hands while walking and crossing the road, pulling the chair for you sit on, etc), lovely and 'flattery' words (which best when you least expected) and anything else that you can dig up from the long lists of chick flick's movies since 1992.

From 17 to 25 years old
Romantic = caring, loving, modest, remembers special dates (birthday, anniversaries, etc), giving flowers and gifts, respect your opinion, accept you for just being you.

From 26 till this moment;
Romantic = caring, loving, modest, responsible, respect your opinion, accept you for just being you, always encourage you to be a better Muslim, wakes you up every morning for Subuh prayer, and above all, prays for your well-being in life and in the after-life after every prayer, every day.

And I'm pretty sure, I'll be holding to this definition for the longest time possible, Insya-Allah.

Minggu beranikan diri

Assalamualaikum wbt

Pada awal minggu, bersemangat sgt nk buat research sejak mule bekerja dgn 2nd supervisor. Bygkan progress dlm mase 2 minggu lg memberangsangkan dr keje 5 bulan seblmnye. Sepanjang 7 bulan bekerja dgn 1st supervisor, boleh dikatekan tiap kali jumpe mesti nangis. Tension, sakit ati... lps tu terus jd malas (teruk kan saye ni?). Alhamdulillah ade pemangkin semangat, suami dan baby yg asyik menendang dlm perut ni.

Cume minggu ni, sgt la depressed. Lps berpk panjang, bincang dgn suami, saye ambil keputusan utk jumpe Research Tutor (mcm penasihat la lebih kurang) utk ceritekan masalah saye ni. Dah nekad dah ni. Ape nk jd, jd la.. drpd menanggung sengsare 3thn yg akan dtg. Td mase jumpe RT dh plan dh "jgn nangis, jgn nangis", skali tu terburai gak ayer mate. Sensitif btol sejak pregnant ni (sblm ni pon mmg sensitif..).

Keputusannye, RT akan bincang dgn 1st supervisor. Lps tu, saye kene bekerja dgn die for another 2 months, kalau x boleh gak, RT akan tukarkan ke supervisor lain. Harap2 inilah penyelesaian yg terbaik utk saye, suami & baby.

Doakan saye ye. Thank you.

Becoming a Mother..

Assalamualaikum wbt

The fact that in less than 3 months I'll become a mother, I guess it is normal to have few anxieties every now and then.

1. Will I be a good mother (according to Islam)?
2. Will I be able to raise a child?
3. Will I be able to care for my husband and our child?
4. Will I be able to cope with my studies?

Honestly, I'm worried. Why?

I'm worried thinking about the challenges of being a mother in a time when people are no longer care about religion and cultural values.

I'm worried thinking that it won't be enough just to send your children to the religious school hoping that they will become a good Muslim.

I'm worried thinking that our society (the Malay Muslims) are now 'proudly' showing their arrogance and ignorance towards Islam.

I'm worried for we are only human, who are not born (and never will be) perfect.

But, at the same time, I'm hoping that Allah will forgive our sins and continue to save us from His wrath (Nauzubillahiminzalik).

Ya Allah, kurniakanlah petunjuk kepada hamba-hambaMu. Ampunkan dosa-dosa kami Ya Allah. Peliharalah kami dari kemurkaanMu Ya Allah.

Amin Ya Rabbal Aalamin.